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Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Surrendering Completely to God

Today I'm dealing with the delicate issue of surrendering our wombs to God.

This is the ultimate surrender as a woman.. let me tell you! Its one of the things our suffragist sisters fought for the most.. and many continue to fight for in the form of the right to have abortions. I'm not going to get into that right now. This post is not about judging others for their choices. Ultimately, everyone has to live with their own choices and believe that their choices are acceptable to the Lord.

I want to gently suggest to you, that if you are walking a path towards trusting God with your life.. you need to consider giving him the reins of all aspects of it. There is a sweetness in surrendering to an Almighty God who you know loves you and wants the very best for you.

We have to believe that he knows what is best for us... sometimes we certainly don't know what's best for us or even for our own children.

We are constantly on our knees asking Him for guidance in each of our children's individual needs or situations. Praying for wisdom and discernment to make decisions for ourselves and for them. This, I believe, is as it should be. When we give the reins of our lives to God and remain open to what He wants to do for us, we literally free His hands as there is no longer the barrier of our own free will.

I recently shared my story with Darlene Schacht after reading one of her inspiring posts and since then I have felt a prodding from our Lord to share it with others. I have resisted for a while, but you know when God wants us to do something, he keeps on gently nudging us. Below is my story.. I hope that it gives you more insight into my faith and encourages you on your own journey.

I was married when I was 22. From the very beginning I was against using anything that was unnatural to my body. Even though my faith teaches that contraception is not part of the Divine Plan for us, I did use condoms for a while. I always say that the Lord has a tremendous sense of humour.. it turned out I was allergic to the latex. I didn't discover this until I had already had baby number 1. 

While pregnant with baby number 2, a year later,  I was anointed with the Holy Spirit and my life became convicted. Thankfully, even though my husband was not travelling the same path as I was, he agreed to stop using condoms.. anything else was simply not an option. I know now that the Lord wanted me to trust Him with my womb.

My children were all born via c-sections since it was determined with the first baby that I could not have delivered normally. Three and a half years later I had baby number 3. At this time, my gynaecologist was adamant that I should not have any more children, that it would be risky. I, however, placed my trust in God and continued to be open to life. Let me just interject here that I believe that God formed a covenant with me, one He constantly reminds me via scripture that stands forever, that He will protect and provide for me as long as I am obedient and do His will.

When my third daughter was five, I became pregnant again. I had spotted with all of my pregnancies and this one was no exception. I was, however, much more active with three school-aged children and no help at home. I continued to drive and work as usual and I had a miscarriage. You can read all about that in the link provided.

Four years later I became pregnant with my last daughter. By now I had a new doctor and she was a woman of faith herself. She told me, as a doctor she needed to tell me how dangerous another pregnancy would be and that a tubal ligation would be recommended, but she did not try to force this upon me. My husband and I prayed about this for months and sought counsel from our priest and we decided that God wanted us to trust Him implicitly.

Today my youngest is four years old. I will admit to being somewhat fearful of becoming pregnant again and heave a sigh of relief each month that I get my period. Yet, even as I do that, I am convicted in my heart that, I am in the palm of His hand. Each day I offer to Him again my life, myself, body, mind and soul to do with as He pleases.

I am just an ordinary woman and it takes hard work to keep this faith. to walk in it, to live by it, to surrender to it daily. It is by no means easy.. I feel weak sometimes, I am fearful, slip and slide and hang on by a thread...yet our God who is gracious and merciful, strengthens me. 

He has blessed me with a husband who, most importantly, shares my faith and supports me in living it out each day. We are by no means a perfect couple.. I have meltdowns occasionally, we have arguments... ultimately though, after many years,  God has placed us on the same path and this is  a vitally important component in living out your faith.

Whatever your own situation.. whether your husband is on the same path, an unbeliever, or of a different faith.. God has you in the palm of His hand.  He will work in your life, in your own individual need and circumstance. Surrender to Him what you can in whatever way you can. You may not be in a position to live your faith in the same way as I do or as anybody else does.

God loves you just as you are and if you open yourself, He will lead you gently to the place He desires you to be. He will open whatever doors are necessary, he will empower and provide for you. Trust in Him.

Its been very encouraging to read the convictions of others. Of note, is a wonderfully put together article by April at My Abundant Life. She's done a lot of research too.  Check out her post here

Until next time, my friends, I pray that God will bless you and your families abundantly! Keep on shining brightly for Jesus!


Traci Michele said...

thank you for sharing your thoughts. u r such a blessing!


Lisa Maria said...

Thank you Traci!

Hugs to you and baby!

Rightthinker said...

Beautiful post..full of truth, and God's goodness!

God Bless!