Gratitude, Grace and Blessings

Today is my 21st wedding anniversary. I'm blessed to be married to my first and only true love. He captured my heart and has held it ever since I was a tender 21 years old. We've been through so many things together. He is my best friend and the one I turn to and lean on and depend upon. He's a wonderful provider and I thank God for the blessing that he is to me. I can honestly say that the trials and highs and lows of life have refined us and our love is stronger than it ever was before.  The years sort of creeped up on us and I cant believe how quickly time has slipped by.

I recently came to the realisation, after being led by the Holy Spirit and getting inspiration from so many wonderful blogs, not to mention what I've been learning in the Book of Ruth and Book of James studies, that I have not truly been grateful for all that I have. Time is so precious and it just slips away, like the silver sand in the little egg timer my four year old is fascinated with. I want to cherish every precious moment I have with my husband and my daughters. Before long, these days and this season in my life will be over.

I have four daughters ranging in age from almost 20 to four years old. As you can imagine, life can be crazy, hectic and there's never time to do everything I have to do... I don't think I'll ever be bored, that's for sure! ;-)   I tend to get crabby and snap at everyone.. I don't do stress well at all! My poor husband and children have had to put up with my big mouth and bad attitude for far too long. I'm trying to change things so that I am the wife and mother they deserve.

Its hard going, but I know this is what God wants of me. I need to be a light to them before I can be a light anywhere else. This is the challenge God threw down for me recently... to change so quietly and completely that my family is astounded by who I am. Well... I don't think I'm doing a great job so far, but I'm getting there!

In my quest for change, I'm trying to be more positive in my outlook, less uptight and not stress on the small stuff as much. I'm trying to be joyful and to give joy. I'm trying to appreciate my family, my husband and be grateful to God for all the wonderful blessings He has bestowed on me.

I'm also trying to learn to slow down and pay attention more... so much slips by my notice because of how busy I get. My youngest daughter starts talking about her day (she does ramble on so... lol) and I lose half of it because I'm thinking about the chores I have to do. Lately, she's taken to doing outrageous things to get my attention because the poor little sweetheart realises Momma's brain is engaged somewhere else. My husband might do something really sweet like make me some coffee and I forget to thank him because I'm rushing to get breakfast on. Oh, the list goes on and on...

All I know is that I look in the mirror and I see this stranger looking back.... when did I get so many lines on my face? Is it time to start dying the greys.. there are so many! (Took care of that this week) My eldest away at college is a wonderful, bittersweet, heart-wrenching reminder that this season in my life is on the brink of changing. My 18 year old is poised to take flight this autumn to pursue her own dreams and my "used to be" baby is a young lady of 14. My four year old is the one who is going to keep me grounded and keep "empty nest" syndrome at bay for  a while. I jokingly think that if my eldest follows in my footsteps I could be a grandmother in a couple of years and my baby would be an aunt! Okay, let's not go down that road...

God, in His infinite wisdom, has lovingly given me this crazy, hectic, disorganized life and I aim to start loving every minute of it! I hope that I will look in the mirror and grow to love the strange woman I see there, even as more greys pop out and more lines appear. It is no small consolation that the man standing next to me is growing older too and we are walking this road hand in hand into the future. How wonderful to feel secure in this love and this life.. to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that no matter what bends this road takes, I have a hand to hold and a God to guide. Our future is in His hands and He loves us!

May the God who is guiding you down your path, shower His graces and blessings upon you and your families today and always!